R-E-L-I-E-F
How do I spell "relief?" Like this: "2.00%" If I get canned now, it won't be for lack of trying.
Funny thing is, I don't feel HUGELY relieved. I guess I've gotten so worn out from stressing at work that as soon as a thought occurs, it banishes itself. I've been feeling pretty fatalistic about the whole thing.
I've been doing new affirmations lately. (Yes, I do affirmations, and if anyone has anything negative to say about it, go tell someone else. I honestly don't care what you think about it.)
It occurred to me, since affirmations are usually meant to be POSITIVE statements, that negative statements are affirmations, too. I mean, "affirm" just means to declare something you believe to be true, right? So, if someone is constantly telling him/herself they stink at something, or to not even bother to try because they know it won't work, then isn't that person affirming something negative about themself? It becomes a negative affirmation.
I've decided to reverse beaucoup years of automatic negative affirmations by repeating a couple of plain, positive ones manymanymany times a day. Whenever I remember to, preferably whenever I draw breath. What's funny is that I can still think about other things and repeat the affirmations at the same time.
No, I don't feel all positive or gung-ho while I'm doing it. I figure it's an experiment, and I'll see how it turns out after about a month. But I'm thinking maybe that's why my relief isn't such a big RELIEF. Maybe it's because the affirmations I've been doing are convincing me that no matter what happens, I'll be fine, just fine. See? An automatic negative thought just came to me, and it went away all by itself.
Poor M. was sitting next to me yesterday at work, and asked me why I didn't just relax into what I was doing since the pressure was off. I started to say something negative, a "what if?" kind of thing, and he said something that expressed absolute exasperation (in a nice way). It made me laugh because I knew what I'd just done, and what I must sound like when I do my "what if's?" And how ridiculous and frustrating it must be for people when they hear me. I know I, myself, don't deal real well with people who are like that. And there I was, doing the same thing I can't stand in other people! (Thank you, sweetie.)
You know what else is a Relief? Having friends who aren't afraid to tell you the truth. Most people are blah-polite. Borrriing. But real friends will tell you straight up, kindly or bluntly, depending on their personality, when you're screwing up. And if you get pissed at them for stating facts, they love you, anyway.
'Course, there are always a few sort-of friends who are complete idiots, and anything they say isn't worth s***, even the nice stuff, because they're idiots, right? So how can you trust them as far as telling the truth? But you can always tell who those friends are by what they say about other things, and those aren't people you would actively seek out, are they?
No, give me an honest person every time. Sometimes truth hurts, but only if you fight it.
Affirmation: "I accept truth and use it to affect good things in myself."
Okay, you can go throw up now.
Funny thing is, I don't feel HUGELY relieved. I guess I've gotten so worn out from stressing at work that as soon as a thought occurs, it banishes itself. I've been feeling pretty fatalistic about the whole thing.
I've been doing new affirmations lately. (Yes, I do affirmations, and if anyone has anything negative to say about it, go tell someone else. I honestly don't care what you think about it.)
It occurred to me, since affirmations are usually meant to be POSITIVE statements, that negative statements are affirmations, too. I mean, "affirm" just means to declare something you believe to be true, right? So, if someone is constantly telling him/herself they stink at something, or to not even bother to try because they know it won't work, then isn't that person affirming something negative about themself? It becomes a negative affirmation.
I've decided to reverse beaucoup years of automatic negative affirmations by repeating a couple of plain, positive ones manymanymany times a day. Whenever I remember to, preferably whenever I draw breath. What's funny is that I can still think about other things and repeat the affirmations at the same time.
No, I don't feel all positive or gung-ho while I'm doing it. I figure it's an experiment, and I'll see how it turns out after about a month. But I'm thinking maybe that's why my relief isn't such a big RELIEF. Maybe it's because the affirmations I've been doing are convincing me that no matter what happens, I'll be fine, just fine. See? An automatic negative thought just came to me, and it went away all by itself.
Poor M. was sitting next to me yesterday at work, and asked me why I didn't just relax into what I was doing since the pressure was off. I started to say something negative, a "what if?" kind of thing, and he said something that expressed absolute exasperation (in a nice way). It made me laugh because I knew what I'd just done, and what I must sound like when I do my "what if's?" And how ridiculous and frustrating it must be for people when they hear me. I know I, myself, don't deal real well with people who are like that. And there I was, doing the same thing I can't stand in other people! (Thank you, sweetie.)
You know what else is a Relief? Having friends who aren't afraid to tell you the truth. Most people are blah-polite. Borrriing. But real friends will tell you straight up, kindly or bluntly, depending on their personality, when you're screwing up. And if you get pissed at them for stating facts, they love you, anyway.
'Course, there are always a few sort-of friends who are complete idiots, and anything they say isn't worth s***, even the nice stuff, because they're idiots, right? So how can you trust them as far as telling the truth? But you can always tell who those friends are by what they say about other things, and those aren't people you would actively seek out, are they?
No, give me an honest person every time. Sometimes truth hurts, but only if you fight it.
Affirmation: "I accept truth and use it to affect good things in myself."
Okay, you can go throw up now.
Lori finally stopped procrastinating at 1:26 PM
1 Comments:
yeah! you go girl!
M.
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